Two weeks from today, the OverThinker and the Nort make their battling debut for the Blogger Blitz crown. Don’t miss it.
That’s right: I made it in to the tournament! For those not in the know, this is a blogger community event wherein a whole bunch of cool people pick video game villains as their champions, then attempt to get those villains to complete bizarre tasks!
On August 6th I’ll be putting up my entry for my first-round match, and who knows where we might end up from there? Honestly, I really don’t care about winning, I just want to do well to make this event great, but… hey, getting to be in more rounds would be cool. We’ll see where the auspices of the judges fall – having been a judge, I know it’s not an easy job, but I know this year’s crowd of distinguished judiciaries will be the best at doing the thing!
So let’s take a quick look at the field this year, shall we?
You can read the whole schedule on Adventure Rules’ blog here, by the way, and I really recommend doing so for links to all the competitors and much more in-depth stuffs. Here I’m just going to quickly run through the events and see what’s going on at the surface. You can also check out this post to meet all the competitors and the judges; every single person taking part is a super-cool person with a lot of talent – some are friends I’ve known for a while and some are new creators for me to become a fan of! – so definitely take a look there.
Our four first-round events for this year are thus as follows:
July 30th (results August 2nd): Totalitarian Teatime, featuring Athena Veta as Marjolaine from Dragon Age vs LightningEllen as Bowser!
These two are both friends of mine, and both extremely talented. Plus they’re both returning veterans, with Athena sitting on the judging panel with me last year and Ellen actually having been the victor of the entire darn thing! I can’t believe this is the first match of the entire bracket, but that’s the luck of the draw for ya.
In this event, the competitors will have to host a tea party while managing a stamina bar that’s getting constantly depleted by their nemesis tossing witty insults their way (for Bowser, I guess this’ll be Mario with such burning jabs as ‘wahoo’ and ‘Mario time’)! They’ll have to make a lot of tea to keep themselves energised and able to socialise with their friendly-neighbourhood-villainous-tea-party-attendees, as well as keeping their infinitely energetic rival at bay.
Athena and Ellen both have a way with words, so I hope they’ll pull out some memorable one-liners while using their cunning and creativity to solve the issue at hand!
August 6th (results August 10th): The Great Baddie Bake-Off, featuring Luna from Gamers United as Thel Vadam (a.k.a. The Arbiter, from Halo) vs yours truly as Xehanort from Kingdom Hearts!
I’m not sure where that came from, but whatever. Anyhoo, I am honoured to be up against another returning competitor – Luna picked the Joker as her champion last year, and although she was eliminated she did a phenomenal job (I’m not just saying that; every single match was ridiculously good, and unbelievably tight), so I’ve got some tough competition!
Luna and I will have to use all our powers of evilness to bake a cake, if you can believe it. We’ll need to source and gather ingredients, follow a delicious recipe and create a beautifully tasty and well-presented dish, all while avoiding the implacable advances of a knife-wielding Tonberry. It’s going to be tricky, and I have to admit I’m not sure where to start! All I have so far are a couple of bad puns and the sense that, well, this is Xehanort, so I’d better make this as ludicrously complex as I possibly can. We’ll see how I get on.
I definitely can’t wait to see what Luna comes up with, too. In fact, I might well be more hyped to read the other competitors’ posts than to submit my own! She showed a lot of creativity last year in her solution to the problem of ‘how does the Joker find love for a Marlboro?’, and I’m betting her Arbiter bakery will be well worth a look.
August 13th (results August 17th): Blogger Blitzception, featuring Flameflash as Sigma from Mega Man vs….?
From here on out, it’s all new competitors: it just so happens that all of us old hats have been paired up in the opening volleys. Flameflash will bring something new, I think: he may have studied up on previous entries, but I’m expecting his style to be different and punchy, backed up with pictorial goodness. As for his opponent… well, a last-minute unavailability means that I think there’s a vacant slot here at the moment. It may have been filled since I looked, but there’s precedent for this situation, actually: last year, we had a competitor withdraw, with the solution being for their opponent to advance automatically, but still have to write their entry and face the judges’ critique. I really hope that whatever happens, we will still at least get to see Sigma’s entry.
But what will Sigma have to do? Well, this is a very meta round in what’s already a pretty meta event: he’ll have to compose a blog post. Sort of. He has to, er… use his abilities to get a three-headed monkey to write a blog post on his behalf, and the judges will then judge the post that the monkey wrote in order to judge the post about the monkey’s post. It’s an odd one, and I really can’t wait to see how Flameflash ends up dealing with this totally bizarre requirement. I’m also not super familiar with Sigma, so I hope I’ll learn about a new and interesting baddie in the process!
And your final first-round event is…
August 20th (results August 24th): Parking Panic, featuring Michael (GitGudAtLife) as Frank Fontaine from BioShock vs Alex Sigsworth as Charles Jericho from Driver!
In this event, our intrepid heroes – er, villains – will have to get themselves neatly parked up in the very last space in the car park, all while fending off a series of superboss battles (who may or may not also be in cars; we shall see).
This is an interesting one because one of the villains in question is literally from a series about driving cars, but don’t let that fool you: if last year’s judgements are any indication of what this year’s might look like, ingenuity will be rewarded much more than a competitor who opts for an obvious solution. Alex Sigsworth will need to pull out something really cool to impress the judges, and he’ll have a higher standard to live up to! I don’t think ‘Charles uses his driving skills to park really well’ is going to cut it, so I’m looking forward to seeing some creative solutions coming out. As for Fontaine, I’ve no idea what sort of nefarious tricks he might have up his sleeve, but I’ll be very interested to find out.
Again, these are two first-time Blitzers, so I’m hoping that we might see some new and interesting takes on the format. I hope that the newbies won’t see the style of posts that us vets are coming up with and just imitate the way Blitz entries have been written up to now; I’m looking forward to seeing newcomers come up with their own takes on how to present their arguments in favour of their chosen villains! Some of my favourite posts last year were the ones that got really creative with their genre and style (we had a sea shanty, some short stories, a structured argument or two…), and there really are no rules on presentation other than ‘impress the judges’, so I really would like to see some stuff that I’d never have thought of. I’m confident in Alex and Michael’s abilities to pull this off!
And that’s your first round schedule of matches, folks. Keep an eye out for yours truly amidst the chaos, and enjoy the mountain of awesome content that’ll be coming out over the next few weeks.
That’s just the first round, too…